Welcome to the beautiful chaos, where your brain is basically a group chat with 37 people yelling at the same time, and none of them know who started the topic.
When people hear “ADHD,” they often picture a hyper 8-year-old bouncing off walls like a ping-pong ball. But guess what? Those 8-year-olds grow up. Some of us become adults who forget our keys inside the fridge or put the milk in the microwave.
Adult ADHD is real. And it’s not just about being “distracted.” It’s like your brain is permanently in 20 browser tabs, 5 of them are playing music, and you can’t find the one responsible for the trumpet solo.
Every day I had that moment where you’re in the middle of writing an important email when suddenly you remember you need to pay a bill, which reminds you that you forgot to call your mom, which makes you think about that vacation you’ve been meaning to plan, and—wait, what was I doing again? Oh, right, the email. Where was I? Sound familiar?
From my experience, I’ve tried every productivity hack on earth, there’s no group more obsessed with planners, color-coded calendars, and productivity apps than people with ADHD.
We download them, love them, use them for three days, then forget they exist and go back to writing our tasks on napkins and receipts.
Bullet journals? Amazing. Until you hyperfocus and spend 3 hours decorating the cover and forget to write a single task inside. Exactly! We are both wildly creative and deeply inconsistent. But hey, at least we make chaos look aesthetic. Ha!
The Working Memory Glitch
Working memory is your brain’s mental sticky note, and with ADHD, those notes keep blowing away in the wind. This explains why you might walk into a room and immediately forget why you’re there, or put down your phone and lose it seconds later. I once spent 20 minutes looking for my sunglasses… while they were on my head. The worst part was that I kept going outside to check if I’d left them in the car or on the patio, squinting in the bright sunlight each time.
The Shame Olympics: ADHD’s Favorite Game
ADHD comes with a lifetime subscription to Imposter Syndrome Monthly. Every little “failure” — a missed deadline, an unpaid bill, the 14th unfinished hobby — stacks up and whispers, “See? You’re just bad at life.”
We internalize so much shame because we feel like we’re not doing right. But plot twist: our brains are just wired differently. It’s not that we’re bad people. We’re just running Windows 95 in a MacBook world — glitchy, sure, but still full of potential.
Facts that hurt
- Here’s the hyperfocus paradox: while we can’t remember to eat lunch, we can spend seven straight hours reorganizing a playlist that only we listen to. Hyperfocus is magical. It’s also kind of terrifying. Like, who’s driving this thing? The cruel irony is that you can’t always choose what captures your focus. Important work presentation? Your brain might refuse to engage.
- Sometimes the time doesn’t exist in our brain. Deadlines? Suggestions, really. Appointments? A trap. You might be ready two hours early or show up three days late — there is no in-between.
- ADHD emotions? They don’t arrive politely. They kick the door down like, “SURPRISE, B*TCH.” Tiny things hit like a truck. One rude email can ruin your day. One compliment can send you soaring. We’re a rollercoaster with no safety bar.
- Executive function is basically your brain’s CEO, handling all those adulting tasks like planning, organizing, and prioritizing. With ADHD, that CEO is perpetually in a meeting or out to lunch.
- ADHD brains are constantly seeking dopamine – that feel-good chemical that’s in short supply. This manifests as both impulsivity and an endless hunt for stimulation.
- Many adults with ADHD also develop exceptional problem-solving skills and adaptability from years of navigating a world not designed for their brains. They’re often the people you want in a crisis – quick-thinking, unfazed by chaos, and able to hyperfocus exactly when it matters most.
- Despite the challenges, there’s another side to the ADHD experience – creativity, resilience, and a unique way of seeing the world.
So What Helps?
We’re not gonna leave you hanging. Here are some real things that help me, not cure, but help:
- Timers. Set one for literally everything. Cooking, writing, getting dressed. Otherwise, you’ll wake up on the couch under a pile of laundry holding a banana.
- Low-pressure routines. Systems that don’t require perfection. Like a “junk basket” to toss all the clutter until you have energy. Or laying clothes out the night before so you don’t end up going to work in pajama pants.
- Forgiving yourself. This one’s huge. Remember you’re not broken. You’re just wired for detours. Give yourself grace.
- Music. Before I start writing, I like to set the mood—tidy desk, AirPods in for noise cancellation, and of course, the unmistakable sound of 2 Cellos to inspire focus and flow.
- Aromatherapy puts me in an unusual state of focus. Citrus scents help a lot.
- Journaling. I’ve been journaling a lot lately, and I’m trying to make it as important a habit as brushing your teeth every morning. It helps me internalize and ****recording my personal thoughts, feelings, and experiences. It helps for a self-reflexion and stress reduction.
The Path Forward
With proper diagnosis, treatment options (which might include medication, therapy, coaching, or lifestyle strategies), and accommodations, adults with ADHD can thrive. Many find that simply understanding their brain wiring brings enormous relief after years of feeling “lazy” or “flaky” or “not trying hard enough.”
ADHD isn’t just chaos. It’s also the spark behind a million wild ideas. It’s messy, loud, emotional, hilarious, exhausting — and sometimes downright magical.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go reheat my coffee… Again.
👉 Got your own ADHD moment to share? Drop it in the comments — let’s laugh about it together. Also, don’t forget to bookmark this post. Because let’s be real, you’ll forget you read it tomorrow.
